Tournament Mode - 12 Rounds

Need 4 players to start - Max 2 computer players allowed

Showing computer player development

Leoloom visits

ballsucka visits

MuleEtude visits

ballsucka joined the game in slot 1

Rolf joined the game in slot 2

MuleEtude joined the game in slot 3

Leoloom joined the game in slot 4

Rolf unjoined the game

Rolf: may I have purple?

Leoloom unjoined the game

Leoloom joined the game in slot 2

Rolf joined the game in slot 4

Rolf unjoined the game

ballsucka: thanks for host rolf

Leoloom unjoined the game

Rolf joined the game in slot 2

Leoloom joined the game in slot 4

ballsucka: i love you

Rolf: works for me

MuleEtude: we uh

Rolf: you guys want to play like this?

MuleEtude: we play this game pretty idiosyncratically just fyi

Rolf: there are no bot commands

Rolf: that's okay

Leoloom: idk how to play

Rolf: just happy to play

MuleEtude: you'll remember quick leo

Rolf: ready when you are

Rolf: just ask for a break if you need one

ballsucka: this is my first time etude is teaching me

Rolf: okay?

Rolf: no worries

Leoloom: sure

Rolf: ask for a break before the summary if you need one

ballsucka: glhf

Rolf: then we can all not hit ready

Rolf: hf

Rolf: err have fun

Round 1 of 12

Leoloom: WHAT WAS THAT

Rolf: that was me assaying plots

Rolf: for crystite

ballsucka: oops

MuleEtude: So see

Rolf: no just place it once

Rolf: then leave it alone

ballsucka: yeah that was my bad

Rolf: no worries, no stress

Rolf: here to help provide a host so you guys can play, if that works for you

MuleEtude: yeah it's cool

ballsucka: I appreciate it

MuleEtude: these boys are laughing their butts off in vc dw

Rolf: if you release a mule on a plot that isn't yours it will run off

Rolf: I ... am okay with a 3 on 1...

Rolf: uhh

Rolf: just try to have fun, and if you are three on voice chat, work together

ballsucka: gotcha

Rolf: I'll try to hold up my end of things

MuleEtude: yeah I'm tryin' to corral 'em but they're bewildered.

MuleEtude: it's not really a three on one though

Leoloom: I have never played this before

Rolf: it's a game about unbridled capitalism

ballsucka: i love capitalism

Rolf: so ... yeah

Rolf: a team game?

Leoloom: stonks

Rolf: ready

Round 2 of 12

Rolf: listen to the pitch of the wampus

Rolf: the higher the pitch the higher it is on the map

Rolf: and the higher you should get ;)

Rolf: just like that

Rolf: see, we can all play and have fu

Rolf: fun

ballsucka: this is neat

Rolf: I don't have the cash to buy, or I might have

Rolf: I'll try to explain my motivations if I have time

Rolf: okay so I was holding back to sell to Leo

Rolf: if Leo wanted any, because generally speaking y oiu will need it

Rolf: so hang on just a sec

Rolf: before you click

Rolf: the last place person gets highest priority

Rolf: so ballsucka gets priority on plot choice

Rolf: I get last place

Rolf: okay?>

ballsucka: okok

Rolf: ready go

MuleEtude: very well

Round 3 of 12

Leoloom: capitalism

MuleEtude: leo loom has the leo luck :)

Rolf: pure unfettered capitalism

Rolf: but with a twist

Rolf: the first player usually gets a penalty every round

Rolf: and the last place players usuallky get a bonus

Rolf: because the author was some sort of twisted genius

Rolf: note: we are about to have a serious problem

Rolf: due to a lack of smithore

ballsucka: oh shit

MuleEtude: i gotcha covered bois

Rolf: and the earthquake didn't help that emergency to come

MuleEtude: charity...

Rolf: it requires 2 smithore to make one mule

Rolf: and the price of a mule for sale = 2 x the price of the sold ore

Rolf: so if ore sells for 230, mules are 460

Rolf: just keep that in mind moving forward. It's early in the game yet

Rolf: and don't forget energy

Round 4 of 12

Rolf: hey more tips

Rolf: okay?:"

Rolf: cluster your territories

Rolf: connected territories and all territories get a bonus at 3

Rolf: when they produce the same thing

Rolf: and all multples of 3

Rolf: so 3 connected ore or three connected energy or 3 total whatever the same --- get a bonus

Rolf: to their production

Rolf: 3, 6, 9, 12

Rolf: ...

Rolf: but connected only means horizontal and vertical, no diagonals

Leoloom: nice wungo pumb play

Round 5 of 12

Leoloom: imagine betting on kazingas

ballsucka: three legged I understand, but two??

Leoloom: might as well bet on wampus

Leoloom: at that point

ballsucka: facts

Rolf: I only bet on the three legged Kazingas

Rolf: (joke)

Rolf: so everyone just remember, everyone needs food and energy

ballsucka: MADE IYT

ballsucka: MAD SKILLZ

Leoloom: radioactive

MuleEtude: we're gonna die down here :)

Rolf: oh and it doesn't really matter to me

ballsucka: ballsucka neva dies, fool

Rolf: but it's nice to hit the action button during production

Rolf: makes it end when everyone clicks

Rolf: so ore

Rolf: it doesn't go above 230

Rolf: and anything above 50 spoils

Rolf: crystite doesn't go above 148 and same thing with 50

Rolf: food spols like a boss

Rolf: energy spoils less

Rolf: anything above one food surplus spoils 50 percent rounded down

Rolf: anything above 3 energy surplus spoils 25 percent rounded down

Rolf: so 4 surplus spoils 1

Round 6 of 12

ballsucka: thank you

Rolf: I know it is a lot of info

Rolf: also do not be afraid to overspend on land

Rolf: at least until about round 8 or so

Rolf: just don't spend more than 976 on round 1

Rolf: I mean more than 972

Rolf: don't spend 976

ballsucka: noted

Leoloom: why 976

ballsucka: me when i find a dead moose rat

Rolf: because a food mule costs 25 and you can get 100 from capturing the Wampus

Rolf: = 125

Rolf: so don't ever bid more than 972 for a plot sale on round 1 unless you are an expert

Leoloom: why

Rolf: if you bid 976 you won't have enough to buy a mule and a food attachment

Leoloom: oh

Rolf: you will be one dollar short

Leoloom: that makes sense

Leoloom: sorry I'm dumb

ballsucka: leoloom i don't want to kiss you

ballsucka: sorry wrong chat

Rolf: if you can catch the wampus

Rolf: no no no

Rolf: no no

Rolf: crystite will never sell for more than 148

Rolf: back off

Rolf: no no no no no no no

MuleEtude: real?

Rolf: real

MuleEtude: huh. thx.

Rolf: crystite always sells for less than 148

ballsucka: why\

Rolf: smithore always sells for less than 230

Rolf: just how the game is coded

Leoloom: thanks buddy

Rolf: food and energy can get way more out of control than the minerals

MuleEtude: fair prices only :)

Rolf: thanks

Rolf: I appreciate it

Rolf: I mean I'm trying to help here ;)

MuleEtude: no sweat. Yeah, I play too altruistically ;)

Round 7 of 12

Rolf: what I mean is that if we have two new players here, it is best to show them how to play but not be too mean

MuleEtude: also true

Rolf: it's a team game after all

Rolf: you know, a colony!

Leoloom: way to play a rolf ballsucka

ballsucka: thanks leoloser

Leoloom: XD

Rolf: lol

Rolf: playing a rolf

Rolf: nice

Leoloom: this is what happens when you forget to flush

Rolf: note how the first place player just got fucket

Rolf: plot loss hurts

ballsucka: noticed

Leoloom: I'm sorry for your loss muleetude

Leoloom: this game is kinda cool

Rolf: it's not a bad game

Rolf: and I appreciate you guys checking it out!!

ballsucka: sure beats spending time with the wife!!

Rolf: this is really the first time playing?

Rolf: for one or more of you?

ballsucka: is mine

MuleEtude: Yeah it is. Pal I know got me into it and these guys are part of the same little clan

Rolf: well thanks for checking it out!

ballsucka: np it's fun

Rolf: there are many toxic players here so just try to get past that

Rolf: if you play others

ballsucka: haha okay

Leoloom: this reminds me of the time I got married!

MuleEtude: guys... play it cool... lmao

ballsucka: haha, that's a mistake I won't make twice leoloom

Leoloom: thank you for not being toxic rolf

Rolf: you are welcome

ballsucka: My wife is a fkn battleaxe

Rolf: this is a game for friends to play

Leoloom: we like playing table top games

Rolf: you guys play axis and allies?

ballsucka: sometimes we larp

MuleEtude: closer to D&D type stuff (pretty fringe tho)

Leoloom: I'm rich!

ballsucka: no youre leoloom

Leoloom: oh yeah my bad, I forget that sometimes

ballsucka: ty

Rolf: 21 food will spoil 1

Rolf: just remember

Rolf: I mean 2

Rolf: 1 spoils 0

Leoloom: oh shoot

Rolf: 2 or 3 spols 1

Leoloom: so I should ahve sold it

Rolf: maybe

Leoloom: oops

Rolf: 3 energy spoils 1

Rolf: I mean 0

Rolf: 3 spoils 0

Rolf: 4 spols 1, 7 spoils 1

Rolf: for energy

Round 8 of 12

Rolf: to repeat, not that anyone asked, but smithore and crystite spoil 50% above 50 units

Leoloom: even the store?

Rolf: no

Leoloom: oh so we're okay then r ight

Rolf: anything you sell to the store never spoils

Rolf: unless there is a store fire

MuleEtude: (unless the store bur- yeah)

Rolf: which there are 2 chances for per game

Rolf: same as pirates, which steal all the crystite

Rolf: but if there is a store fire, all the stuff in the store burns

ballsucka: I HATE FIRE

Rolf: yes

Round 9 of 12

Rolf: your friend tricked you

Rolf: (in the last land auction)

Rolf: you guys want to play again after this? Rematch?

MuleEtude: mbe

Rolf: I'm happy to host again

Rolf: k

MuleEtude: those rascally pirats

Rolf: so I have to sell 19

Rolf: otherwise they would have just spoiled

Rolf: all of them I think

Rolf: I think I said 50% earlier but I think it's all of them

Rolf: what's a pirate's favorite letter?

Leoloom: q?

ballsucka: what

ballsucka: p?

Rolf: it's not arrr

Rolf: it's THE SEA

ballsucka: hahahahahhaahhahahahahahahhaahaaaaaa

MuleEtude: i dig it

Leoloom: I don't get it

ballsucka: pirates c food and eat it

Leoloom: oh I get it

Leoloom: because pirates are fat

ballsucka: like my wife

Leoloom: XD

Rolf: lol

Round 10 of 12

Rolf: the sea?

Rolf: C

Rolf: no?

MuleEtude: (i think they got it, lol)

Rolf: in this game it's Crystite

Rolf: ;)

Rolf: oic

Rolf: also no negative events will ever happen after round 11

Rolf: so that's nice

Leoloom: pirates should steal our loot

ballsucka: does me losing count as a negative event

Rolf: only for you

Rolf: pirates can still come for the next two rounds

Rolf: I mean negative player events or negative global effects

ballsucka: rolf i have a question

Rolf: shoot

ballsucka: what is your favorite animal

Rolf: humans

ballsucka: O.O

Leoloom: humans smell pretty good

ballsucka: mule told me man is the sweatiest game or something

ballsucka: mule etude

Rolf: yes that's a short story

Rolf: "man is the sweatiest animal

Rolf: it's all about deodorant

ballsucka: neat

Rolf: something about going to an island

ballsucka: yeah I heard about that it's a bunch of little boys and the fat one dies right

Rolf: and the more you smell the greater your chance that the psycho running the thing will shoot you

Rolf: I think so

Rolf: his house was made of sticks

ballsucka: more like made of stinks haha

Rolf: right?

MuleEtude: I thought that was a Roald Dahl title

Leoloom: of mice and men, right?

Rolf: anyway at the end, the evil bad man went down the chimney of his fat brother in the brick house

ballsucka: it's called ov micey men

Rolf: into the pot of turpentine over a fire I think

Rolf: it's a disney cartoon

ballsucka: i remember that

Leoloom: the greet gatby is pretty good too

Round 11 of 12

ballsucka: its a doggy dog world out there

Leoloom: *crickets chirp*

Rolf: I built my house of straw

Rolf: I built my house of sticks

ballsucka: I liked the log goodby by raymin chandlir

Leoloom: is that osha certified

Rolf: look out

Leoloom: *crickets chirp again*

Rolf: lol

Rolf: ol muleetude gonna take your girl and gone

Leoloom: I have no woman

Rolf: this is the first time I have ever seen a next to last round selling frenzy on plots

Rolf: take that for what it is worth

Leoloom: I'm guessing we're playing wrong

Leoloom: lol

Rolf: usually by this point you're pretty happy with what you've got

ballsucka: i wish I had no woman

Leoloom: look rolf, I'm gonna be honest with you, idk what I'm doing or what the goal is, I just like seeing the money move

ballsucka: my wife has been BUSTING my BALLS lately

MuleEtude: we kinda meme it up a little

Rolf: it will take a few games

Rolf: but round 11 plot sales are not the meta

Rolf: if I may use that word

MuleEtude: understandable.

ballsucka: you may

MuleEtude: however... funnye

Rolf: and I am not saying that I didn't try to win, but I did try to play the game in a way that everyone had fun

MuleEtude: @u@

ballsucka: i had fun

Rolf: if I had played all mean it would have been ... different

Leoloom: at least we survived

Rolf: and I'll play nice again if you guys want to play

Rolf: yes indeed

Leoloom: I'm gonna be real with you rolf, I don't think you were ever in danger of losing

Rolf: it's easy to not survive if everyone play crazy

Rolf: there's still a chance

Rolf: but I still played nice, right?

ballsucka: right

Rolf: I tried to play nice

ballsucka: you did

Leoloom: idk what it's like to play mean

Rolf: cause I am a nice guy

Rolf: I could show you

MuleEtude: The guy who got me into this thing has proposed to sub in for a second, Rolf. 'ppreciate the hosting.

Rolf: but I choose not to

ballsucka: you aren't like leoloom he's a reall a** hole

Rolf: are you going to play again?

Leoloom: we're unfortunately going to have to hop off after this

ballsucka: probably another night sometime

Rolf: okay I will show you how to play mean now

Rolf: because there was a fire

Rolf: oh wait I have no money

Rolf: shit

Leoloom: LOL

MuleEtude: lol

ballsucka: lol

Rolf: I will show you how to play nice now

ballsucka: hahaha

Leoloom: so kind

MuleEtude: how raucous!

ballsucka: ralph, youre a real nice guy, unlike my wife, who is a reall nasty w*man

Rolf: okay never mind I have money now

Rolf: I will show you how to play mean

Rolf: for ore

Leoloom: just like my wife

MuleEtude: my comrades need to chill, eh? always so ribald.

Leoloom: after the divorce

ballsucka: i'm not fkn bald stop calling me fkn bald

Leoloom: I

Leoloom: am not ribbed either

Rolf: oh never mind someone sold 22

Rolf: I can't show you now

ballsucka: leoloom you are actually bald

Leoloom: and you're ribbed

Leoloom: bl*cked

Rolf: if none of you had had the wits to sell I would have shown you

ballsucka: F*CK OFF

ballsucka: I'M NOT A CUCK

Rolf: what is your discord channel

Rolf: I'll join you assholes

MuleEtude: we uh

Rolf: you seem like a good crowd

MuleEtude: we use m*mble

Rolf: memble

Rolf: err meh

Rolf: mble

Rolf: member memble

Rolf: member?

Round 12 of 12

Rolf: sheesh my purple orange color blindness kicked in there

Rolf: oh well

Rolf: hey good game all

ballsucka: good game

Rolf: and if you guys were really playing your first games ever, I think you learned very quiclly

Rolf: and so you should all play with me again :)

Rolf: some other time if not now

Rolf: not you Etude

Rolf: you obvs aren't playing your first game

MuleEtude: aye, aye.

ballsucka: we'll hop on some other time if we see you

Leoloom: this was my f irst time

ballsucka: same

Leoloom: I think it was pretty cool

ballsucka: same

Leoloom: I like mule now

ballsucka: same

Rolf: was fun

Leoloom: I am now a better human being

ballsucka: same

Rolf: my goas is to play games with people in a way that will help them to appreciate the game

ballsucka: wait, I thought I was gonna win

Rolf: not to be a dick

Leoloom: how do you win btw

Rolf: even if I end up winning

Rolf: you gotta get gud

Rolf: it takes time

ballsucka: you should play the other way, leoloom loves dick

Leoloom: I mean what's the goal

Rolf: to win

Leoloom: you're not supposed to tell him that

ballsucka: sy

ballsucka: sry

Rolf: also the colony can do bad or good

ballsucka: Probably shouldn't have told my wife neither

Rolf: it's best when you win and also you retire in luxury estates

Rolf: below that is elegant estates

Rolf: below that is a good colony or whatever

Rolf: below that is ...

Rolf: then below that is barely survive

ballsucka: im honored we got to play with 248 on the leaderboard

Rolf: play with me again then

Game Over

Saving score, please wait...

Score saved

Rolf: you all had fun right?

Leoloom: I've never played with a top 248 in anything before

Rolf: if so that was my goal

MuleEtude: t'were fun, yes

ballsucka: another time for sure

Rolf: right on

Leoloom: gg

Rolf: see you all next time

Rolf: gg

ballsucka: gg

Leoloom: was fun

ballsucka left the game

MuleEtude left the game

ballsucka was disconnected

MuleEtude was disconnected